I like sticks! Is it time for foodtime? My eyes are very tiny. Everything is tiny compared to my big face. I’m tired. It must be time for naptime. Snore.I’m up again. What are you eating? Can I have some of what you’re eating? What do mean no? No. No. No is a funny word. No. No. You know how if you say a word over and over it loses all meaning? I don’t. No. No. That’s fun to do.
Hey, what’s that? Right over there - I saw something. It was like a bug or a bird or a passing car or a mailbox or something. I wonder what that was. I’m gonna go over there and look. It’s a bug! I’m gonna try and eat. Bugs taste good. Everything tastes good. I ate a crayon once. It tasted good. Is it time for outside time? I wanna go outside. Hey, let me out. Hey, let me out. Hey, let me out. Thank you.
Outside is fun. There is grass a lot of places outside. Oh, look, a tree. I’m going to go to the bathroom on it. Going to the bathroom is fun. I feel lighter now. I wonder if that means I can fly? I’m gonna jump up and down until I fly away. That isn’t working. I wanna come inside now. Outside got boring. Hey, let me in. Hey, let me in. Hey. let me in. Thank you.
Oh my god, what is that terrible machine you keep running back and forth over the carpet? Oh my god, what is that? That has a terrible noise. Oh, this is terrible. I can only assume that it is coming for me next. I have to hide. But where can I hide that no one will be able to find me and suck me up that terrible machine? Think, dog, think! I got it. I’ll put my paws over my eyes. I’m invisible now. I wonder if I can go eat out of the trash now that I am invisible? Mmmmm, trash is good to eat. Trashcan...trashcan trashcon…trishcon…fishcon…fishbun…wishbun…wishbone…Wishbone! Oh I want to eat a bone. Bones are good. Bones are made of hard food.
Life is funny probably. I’m a dog. One day I got out and ran away but I got hungry and came back. Food. Was someone talking about food? I’m hungry. Oh, wait I’m tired again. Snore.
-Pretty Dog
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